WHY DO NIGERIAN CELEBRITY MARRY SECOND HAND HUSBAND?

By Caleb Akowe

While i was Washing my Cloths Today i saw a girl Talking about Second Hand Husband. I stared at her in shock and confusion because up until that moment, I had never heard of a

phrase as “brand new or 2nd hand husband. 

It became a heated debate between me and her today that I became late for Church . ‘WOW’, I never thought a phrase like 2nd

hand can be attributed to a human being.

 I know it is only applicable to objects.

At first i was angry. How could they

have said such. But as crazy and odd as it may

have sounded, she drew my attention to her observations that it is a trend currently popular

amongst female celebrities in nigeria. 

The guys in the house even tweaked it into a joke.

Adding that it is a normal thing in nigeria that when you can’t afford a brand new car you go for a 2nd hand one. I couldn’t help but laugh

at that one. 

But on my way to church today I thought about it for a minute and asked myself if truly a 2nd hand or brand new theory can be a determinant in finding a husband? It got me staring at every car passing by, trying to understand

the rational behind the argument of a 2nd hand husband and a brand new one. How do you

determine if a husband is a 2nd hand? I asked myself. 

I was later told that a man becomes a 2nd

hand if he was previously married or is still married to another woman before taking a new wife. And that a 2nd hand husband just

like a 2nd hand car comes in two types. Nigerian used and Tokunbo.

Meaning the husband who was previously married and living here in nigeria is the “nigerian used”, while the one shipped in from abroad is the Tokunbo version. Shocking isn’t it? Ok, let us analyse this for a minute.

 It is a known fact that in nigeria, when you want to buy a 2nd hand car you are strongly advised to take a mechanic with you. So can you also do the same with a 2nd hand husband? Should it also be recommended that when going for a 2nd hand husband you should make sure to take a medical doctor

to administer all the necessary check ups to be sure you are not getting damaged goods?

Because in the true sense of it, a 2nd hand is a 2nd hand whether car or husband.

And If the carburetor of a 2nd hand car can easily pack up on 3rd mainland bridge, it means a 2nd hand husband can also pack up on the way to the alter.

 As these thoughts were spinning in my

head, I began asking myself the same questions they asked me.

Why do nigerian female celebrities

prefer 2nd hand husbands. Or Why

would anyone prefer a 2nd hand

husband? But come to think of it, Is

it that our female celebrities can no

longer afford the luxury of waiting

for the brand new ones to come

along?

Or have the brand new ones refused to be fooled by the razzmatazz or flashy make ups, thick foundations, artificial nails, Brazilian hair, Peruvian eye lashes and Zara shoes ? Can it be attributed to a thing of choice? They said a 2nd

hand husband is often an Alhaji or

an Otunba with pot belle and deep pocket.

Is it because of the money or societal status of the men? As long as he is fully loaded she really does not care. Some went further to say that a 2nd hand husband is already tested and trusted with a confirmed rate of performance and durability?

So figure a female celebrity asking

her colleague, “What is the mileage

of your 2nd hand husband? And

she replies “Ahhh I nor know say

hin former wives don finish am

oo.. Na shaft I marry ooo, My sista

nor be small thing ooo, even my

doctor sef say him liver go soon

park up.

 And na for hospital I dey sleep for the past 3 weeks.

Just like 2nd hand car owner dey

sleep for mechanic workshop

everyday. As my Curiosity got the

better of me, I asked them for

names of female celebrities with

2nd hand husbands.

 I was shocked beyond recognition that the list

they gave me was as long as the

distance from mile 2 to Badagry.

According to the list, almost all married female celebrity in nigeria has a 2nd hand husband and even some of the female celebrities

themselves are 2nd hand.

And some of the male celebrities

also have 2nd hand wives or they themselves are 2nd hand. Well, if you don’t believe me, make a list of your own and be amazed as I am

right now. My conclusion is that the issue of

2nd hand husband is not peculiar to entertainers. 

It is a general societal disease and it is as a result of too many failed marriages we

have in the society at large.

While nobody should be blamed for falling in love or getting married to whoever he or she chooses, it is also important that we position our lives to inspire the children and

future entertainers who see us as role models in the society.

You may argue that it is not the society’s business what you do with your affairs. Which is very true but

also remember that being a celebrity makes your life a public affair.

 So go ahead girls, take home the 2nd hand husbands, it is your choice and it does not matter even if he looks like an “accidented” car

with scary mileage.

If you love him that much and he has some money to spend, you can

take him to the highly skilled american body mechanic called Dr. 90210 to panel-beat and mask all his dents. And if you are fortunate

to find one whose mileage is manageable, you can take him to Ladipo market, buy the missing

body parts and get a local panel- beater to fix him.

And if you are a handy-woman,

You can even do the servicing

yourself by getting a complete first

aid kit with bandages, Ampiclox, mentholatum and Aboniki Balm and massage all his 

joints every night before sleeping